The number one thing that women lie about on dating sites? Their weight. Men have told me countless time that they feel so lied to when a woman photoshops photos or uses outdated photos that depict her as far thinner than she is now. I feel something else. I feel sadness. Sadness for the women that struggle not to define themselves by what they weigh. I find women of all shapes and size beautiful and fascinating. So do many men. It is heartbreaking to hear of women that feel the need not to walk proudly and own their magnificent body that has more than likely born them children and served them well.

You don’t need to thin to be attractive, to attract a man, to feel sexy. You need to be healthy. You need to be able to chase your kids, walk up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing. You need to make good choices and fuel your body with nutritious food. You need to cut the junk out of your diet. Believe you me, I was the biggest diet Coke fan for years. A complete addict. When I switched to water, I felt an incredible shift in my energy and health, not to mention your skin literally glows when you stop putting all the rubbish in your body. Lets face it, emotions can play havoc with our weight. We either overeat to feel better, or like me during my recent heartache, lose 10 lbs in less days. Understanding our emotional triggers are key to getting to route of the problem. It still comes down to the simplest fact: You have to consume fewer calories per day than you burn.

Ironically my dating profile photos are when I was quite a bit heavier. I like it when I am more curvy. I feel sexier and more womanly.

It’s to reframe our way of thinking. What is attractive, what is sexy? I can tell you right now that many men find curvaceous women far more beautiful and sensual than rake thin women. But it is far more important to love our own bodies and embrace the beauty of the female form. You can’t expect someone else to love your body if you don’t first.

Self love is so very important. Wear a bikini, and be brave enough to step out saying, “Damn, I look and feel great” You don’t have to be a size 2 to wear one. Wear a sexy dress, show your cleavage or legs off. Feel the inner goddess coming out. Walk tall and proud. You are beautiful from the inside out.