NOBODY EVER SAID I WAS A PERFECT MOTHER
The funniest (actually maybe not funny) things happened today. I was telling a friend that I got a pass on going to the gym because I had to haul this water home. I then got told off by this friend about how bad plastic bottles are for the environment, and how I should use reusable bottles.
Sigh. Yes, I should, but then again, I’ve stopped trying to live up to everyone’s expectations of what a super mom is. I’m a human mom. The fact that my kids are well fed with home-cooked meals, clean, that they don’t go without essentials, live in a nice home is a miracle in itself.
Because guess what? Walk a day in my shoes, or a day in any single mother’s shoes, or for that matter, any mother’s shoes, and I promise you’d be buying that damn bottled water too.
It’s the hardest job in the world and the least glamorous with very little thanks. It’s years of self-sacrifice, sleep deprivation, worry and heartache. It’s days filled with keeping babies nourished and cared for, days that run into weeks, then months, and suddenly their off to college, and you’re left wondering what happened to the years. You’re left with regrets for all the things you meant to do with them but didn’t have the time or resources for. You’re left wondering if you have taught them enough… if you were good enough.
I’m lucky. I had enough children that by the time I’ve had 24 years experience with raising them and another 8 years to go, I’ve learned to say, “So what?” Nobody gets to judge my messy life, and yes fellow mama’s it’s messy isn’t it? I remember when you couldn’t see the floor of my living room for the sea of toys and baby debris. I would have died of embarrassment had some just stopped over, because yes, we are all living up to some impossible standard, set by who knows who. Maybe the people who weren’t brave enough to venture into parenthood?
So let’s just embrace it, the clutter, the financial strain, the worry over mental health, the insecurities of not being enough. Let’s buy the bloody bottled water and hold our heads up high knowing that every day we are making a difference in our child’s life and damn it we are doing our best.
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