Yep, we all have our little rituals we do before we head out on a date, especially if we in any way think this date is going to end intimately. Of course, we are not going to let on that this date has taken us hours to get ready for, between getting your nails done, waxing, washing and drying your hair. A man has it easy, shower, maybe shave and get dressed. If you’re really lucky he’ll wear cologne and steam his clothes.

Now for us women, it’s a marathon. I equate it to having kids. When my kids were young, all good. I knew that I was in the chaotic bliss of diapers, feeding, cooking and cleaning. I knew once they were a bit older that even though I loved that stage there was no way I was going back into it once I was out of it.

The same things goes for dating. If you maintain your routine of self-care, it’s easier to go out on a date. It’s not a mad rush to book an appointment for a Brazilian if you do them anyway. You’re dating, it’s a way of life.

So here goes, exposing the things we’d rather not admit we do to prep for a date:

1) Squeaky Clean

I am never going out on a date that might end up in the bedroom without a complete shower and shave. I can’t imagine anything worse than going on a date…and having to “dry-shave” with his razor because you didn’t before leaving. I have a secret. I CAN’T stay over without washing my face. Crazy right?…I can’t sleep unless I’ve done my nightly routine. I guess there’s nothing wrong with packing a few essentials…just in case.

I’ve heard some women carry wet wipes with them to freshen up. I’m not so sure about this one…ever tasted a wet wipe? Yep, enough said. Maybe stick to wetting paper towels in the ladies room and steer clear of any acrid tasting wipes, if you understand where I’m going on this one!

2) Researching the Menu

I am a picky eater. I don’t eat fish, and there’s a whole list of foods that I’m not partial to. It’s odd, sushi must be a very sexy food, it’s usually the first pick for a man. Anyway, for the most part, there’s always something on a menu that I like…or actually, enjoy. I don’t like to take away from the conversation by having to look at length at the menu, so yes, I have been known to pre-screen it beforehand. It makes a woman look decisive, and it doesn’t take but a minute to pretend to look at what you want.

3) That Time of the Month

Luckily for me, it has never happened that I’ve had my period the first time I’ve had sex. Even so, I tend to like to ask the question. I know my preference, but I’ll defer to what he wants. No, you can’t say that men will have sex regardless of whether you have your period or not. I’d much rather have the discussion beforehand than a really awkward moment later. There are some men that would rather abstain, and others that would rather throw down a towel and not worry. It’s good communication, and if you can’t talk about a natural thing like your period, then how are you going to talk about the next topic…

4) The STD Talk

I get tested after each partner, especially if there is any doubt of their faithfulness. I would rather know, and I also have no problem showing the test results to a potential partner. It’s not unromantic, I’d rather have a frank discussion than spend the rest of my life regretting a night of passion. If you’re not comfortable asking your partner when the last time he got tested was then condoms it is for you. While on the talk of condoms, it’s not a bad idea to carry a couple. I’ve even tried the female condom, and if you don’t mind having sex with what feels like a turkey basting bag inside of you then I highly recommend it. Jokes aside, if you’re not going to have a conversation, then protect yourself at least until you can build some trust.

5) The Potential Baby Maker

This one always amazes me. There are so many men that don’t want children, yet never had a vasectomy. It’s fine when a woman is younger and can be on the pill, but it’s a little trickier when she gets older as her options for contraception before menopause are limited. Again, it may not be very romantic, and I don’t recommend waiting until you are hot and heavy and about to do the deed, but it’s not a bad idea to discuss it if there’s even a chance you’ll have sex. Discussing these things in no way means you are going to have sex. You are merely gathering information, it’s not signed and sealed until you decide it to be so.

6) Lingerie

I can’t imagine anything worse than finding yourself in an intimate situation and knowing that you have undergarments on that have seen better days. Unless you have a man like my ex that felt so uncomfortable around as much as a thong, know you’d better at least slip into sexy panties just in case! At the very least, you’ll feel sexier and more feminine knowing what you have on underneath. I wear sexy lingerie for myself. Do yourself a huge favor. Wear it every day…not just on days that someone might see it. Wear your favorite perfume daily, not just on special occasions. You are worth it, so do things for you because they make you feel good, so when your man does get to see you half-naked, you are comfortable and a woman that is relaxed and accepting of herself has more to offer and is far sexier.

7) The Wardrobe

I am unapologetic that I have a lot of clothes, but I tend to wear the same few things on first dates. I guess they are clothes that I feel comfortable in, and when I feel comfortable, I am relaxed and I feel sexier. I recommend that you try on some outfits in your wardrobe, try to stick to something simple, but more importantly what makes you feel good about yourself. Don’t dress for your date, dress for you. Put your “go-to” outfits to one side which means you can grab and go at a moment’s notice.

Do I always look my best? No, are you kidding! I am not picking up any potential dates at the grocery store after coming straight from the gym. However, yes, I am going to make sure that I don’t get caught out on a date and feel like I’m rejecting a man because I didn’t prep properly. I’m going to make sure that if there’s as much as a smidgen of a possibility that I am ready from head to toe!