First of all, I want to know who made up the dating rules? Who said that as a woman you need to act cool and aloof and not let a man that you are interested in him. Wait before you text him back so it doesn’t look like you are too needy, and God forbid don’t sleep with him for X amount of dates. 

I don’t know about you, but these “rules” are exhausting and it’s hard to relax when meeting a man for the first time if you are constantly worried about how to act according to this bizarre rule book.

Com’on, it’s nearly 2020, it’s time that we as smart and empowered women make up our own rules. It’s time to stop basing our dating life on a bunch of rules that we have no clue who made them up and start trusting ourselves. Rules, after all, are made to be broken!

I have a rule after many months of dating. My rule is not to limit myself. Not to limit my selection of men down to a “Type” as to what he looks like or what he does for a living or where he lives even. The right man could live 1000’s of miles away and if we meshed, then we would find a way. Love has an interesting way of doing that. 

When you follow dating rules you are following someone else’s value system. If my friend says, “Don’t sleep with a man on the first date.” that’s perfectly fine for her, but maybe for another person, it’s different. Nobody can tell you what you should or shouldn’t do simply because they would or wouldn’t.

Open your mind to new possibilities and stop worrying about the rules and set your own guidelines as to what you feel is important to you. Worry about the “How”, how you can become more successful at dating and how to have a fulfilling relationship. Breaking down new strategies that will help you find the man of your dreams is far important than following “The Rules”.

Love is not a project. If you are finding yourself with someone where you are having to work really hard to feel loved, to feel an attachment, then maybe it’s just not a good fit. Love is not a website design, a blog post, a garden, love isn’t a project that you can micro-manage. Love shouldn’t be so hard. It shouldn’t feel like a chore. 

Try not to be so cynical. Isn’t making yourself vulnerable and maybe getting a little hurt in the process better than sitting home on the couch and binge-watching Netflix? Go in with a positive attitude. Dating is an effort, but it also fun, and I have met very special and dear people online that enhance my life with their friendships. If you don’t have time to date, how will you have time for a relationship?

There’s nothing wrong with taking a break from dating. A time to recharge, and let the dating pool renew. It’s a great idea to always be working on yourself to find new interests and keep loving and engaging your life. 

Finding love is absolutely possible. It takes three things:

Belief: It’s a belief that the universe is going to bring you love. You have t believe it is going to happen for you. 

Desire: A yearning that you want a man in your life. One that comes from within you, not your family or friends.

Action: Love is not going to come knocking at your door unless he’s the UPS man. You have to get out of your house and find it, and yes, for the most part, that means going online.