Ha! I had a friend once that used to challenge my thoughts on happiness. No matter what he tried to convince me that contentment comes from within and happiness is from external influences. I am a happy person by nature. I believe my happiness radiates from within.

One thing I know for sure is that everyone is chasing happiness. What is happiness to you? How do you obtain it?

Why is it that I know I am right and my friend was wrong? Happiness is a daily journey. You are never going to arrive at a destination called “Happiness” It’s a daily quest to keep filling up the happiness tank and be mindful of what brings you immense joy. Happiness is a choice. If you choose it, it will come to you. To be happy all the time it comes from within, it’s a state of mind. It’s a way of thinking. I am happy that my life is messy and full vs why is my life not more organized and in order? Why is it my child makes messes, or I am blessed and happy to have a child who is in my life. Choose to be happy in times of adversity and stress. You can have all the money in the world, have an amazing body, a fabulous man in your life, and you are still unhappy. You can’t “go to” happiness, you have to “be happy”

Happiness cannot be a goal. In the pursuit of happiness, people can be less happy over time. They become so focused on the achievement of happiness and become disenchanted, and unhappy. Happiness doesn’t come from chasing emotions, instead, happiness comes from being willing to experience any emotions that are presented to you.

Happiness is observing your life and not craving drastic change. That’s where the contentment comes in. If you desire for change, it can often make you feel restless and unhappy, but if you are content about where you are in life, very often that will boost your feelings of happiness. Be present in your life, and be content about your current state.

What are some actionable steps to get you to a happy state?

1. Happiness is not something that depends on outside influences. Happiness is something that you create for yourself. You get to wake up every day and decide, “Today is going to be a terrific day” or “Today is going to be awful” It’s your choice. You have to reframe your way of thinking. Look for the positive and the light.

2)Happiness is not connected to material things. Things cannot bring you deep happiness. Happiness really starts with the interpersonal relationships you have with yourself, and then others. You have to know what sad feels like first to be able to know what happiness feels like. You have to be open to your emotions. If you do things that make you feel great about who you are, Do things that make you feel happy. That’s not buying things, eating things, it’s about immersing yourself in discovering who you, and choosing happy.

Happiness is not what others can do for us or give us. As long as you are looking for someone else to give you happiness, you could find yourself unhappy. Embrace who you are, all your imperfect flaws. Love yourself.

Happiness all starts with how you feel about yourself. How do you feel about yourself? Are you accepting and loving of yourself? That’s the key here. Happy people are full of self-love. They accept that they are not perfect, and love themselves regardless.

What happens when you are feeling sad? Embrace emotions that are the opposite of happy. Feeling sad doesn’t define you. It’s okay to feel sad. Allow yourself to work through them and allow the negative emotions to pass.

My trick is not to give too much power to others. I try not to let perfect strangers affect my happiness. I put far more emphasis on my own self-talk and beliefs. Who am I? What do I think about myself? You can’t control how others treat you but you are 100% in charge of how you treat yourself. Happiness is a personal thing, You are the only one that can decide what happiness is for you. You get to create your own happiness. What a gift. Be open and honest and self reflect on why you are not happy, or how to create more happiness in your life. What is it that you need or want in your life. Happiness starts from within, but for sure outside influences play a part too.

I want nothing more than to create a network, a community of happy women that are understanding of their needs and that they feel whole and blissfully happy. Download the workbook below to help guide you on your journey to happiness.

All my love,

Caroline